Tomochii

new journal entry after!!!!! wait.. how many... uhmm.
AFTER 7 MONTHS!! yey for hiatus!

FINAL COLLEGE DAYS

I have been TOO busy with school stuff especially our final thesis defense where I have became truly desperate to finish those deadlines. I even escaped out of hospital confinement just to finish all of it @_ @ sigh.. but all things come to a good end I got included in the top ten yey!

not to mention the scenography cosplay skit we have performed

a5.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphoto…

1st performance: at the insy winsy tiny audio-visual room
2nd performance: Thesis exhibit at the 7th flr. tech bldg.
3rd performance: Tech building auditorium
4th perfomance: FEU auditorium

remembering all of it makes me so tired and happy at the same time  

Our graduation came after that
happy happy graduation XD I wasn't even sad at all
I was actually glad I guess mixed feelings

FACING THE REAL WORLD

I went to Baguio after graduation, I decided I should take a vacation before finding a permanent job but now I'm having a hard time on what career path should I choose. As for me I want to be an illustrator but usually when you're  finished with a Fine Art degree here in our country most people end up being a graphic artist etc. because it's in demand and more common I think :/ recently I've been looking for companies who needs graphic artists and the skill required are photoshop, illustrator and indesign. I know how to use photoshop but the other 2 softwares is an exception, been self studying for a few days now and its really tiring.. gughgh..


too many paths and choices.. All I wish is that i could choose the right path and not regret afterwards..

sighhhhhh..

end end end

Its been 5 months since i have made an update here.... I.. couldn't sleep properly and got nothing to do..

my insomnia is attacking me again its been 3 days and i haven't slept properly, I only get 2-3 hours of sleep each day. I try to force myself to sleep but it becomes much more difficult for me.
Whenever i close my eyes different images and voices are sprouting inside my head. images of past events that I thought I have forgotten but yet they are coming back...

many things have happened lately and my soul seems to be lost..
most of the time.

such full of misunderstandings, self-pity and STRESS.

i feel so sad, depressed,ignored, aggressive _{*i am aggressive*} all the time sometimes I don't even know whats the origin of it.. hormones.. PMS.. Bipolarity... split personality?its like some kind of energy is sucking out the positive charges in me.
heck.. i dunno... my brain is all messed up. literally.

I used to cope up with these things before~ trying to replace then with smiles and laughter but i guess my heart couldn't take it any longer... _{even trying to force myself to have a happy-go-lucky persona which i am NOT}
i guess all I needed is some time to let it out and think things thoroughly...


AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH goddamtit..

when will this negative feeling go away.. shooo shoooo


although im a bit better now..(LOL) thanks to a friend

55% percent of depression is somehow gone and slapped away from me and the 45%... i'll handle that myself please. = A =""

i'll also buy a journal again to write some stuffs.. i have many of them when i was in high school, guess i need one of those again,
have some activities to go to, *KOREAN HORROR FILM FEST!* and meet up with some old friends...i miss those people..

dghah... its 4:25am.. i have to go to school later at 6:30..
i still got 1 hour of sleep. yey.

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

it's okay to be sad and feel depressed as long as you won't forget to feel happy again" -anonymous

"everyone is unique in its own way. don't expect everyone to be like you."

Pentab Crisis
My pentab more specifically the pen broke, The day before my birthday..
= _ = I didn't panic so much since I know it still has its warranty. Though im still feeling bad about what happened to it..
_{clumsy stupid me...}
I was going return it back to its case when suddenly, the pen accidentally fell off to its case, leaving the tip broken into half.. The root was stuck on the inside and it can never be removed.. so that was hell of a problem... I went to the store the next day where i bought it and show the receipt hoping it still can be replaced. Luckily the management accepted to replace it... although it would take 1 week before they would contact me again.. I really hope it would't take longer than that. I really need it for my thesis illustrations.. sigh..

moral lesson: Always HANDLE WITH CARE the things that are important to you.

Birthday madnesss
weeeeeeeee.. I just finished celebrating my birthday and it was fun..! I Invited some of my friends to hangout that day and we ate at Shakey's near our house. They surprised me with a birthday song and gave me free ice cream hahah~ we went to trinoma after ward to watch movie.. but it wasn't great.. I love watching ashton kutcher though..` ohohooh~ * w * we were supposed to watch karate kid.. but the cinema was full already :/ after watching a dissapointing movie, we went to arcade and had some karaoke at the usual place we go to afterwards XDD,ater pending 3 hours of neverending singing, we all went home and thanked for such a happy day. I never get to celebrate my birthday this past two years, so I guess it worh it..

AwooO a woo~

This is OBLIGATORY journal entry :LOL:
- means i'm giving myself an obligation to write another journal entry for the sake of my frequent memory loss.

_{(well its not that serious, i just tend to forget thing s easily. That is why im forcing myself to write about it. What's worse is, I accidentally erased all the marked events in my cellphone calender. From the day I bought my cellphone upto the present. I still can't get over my stupidity. sigh.
so now maybe I have to write as much as possible.. im having plans to revive my blog, I guess thats much better that posting stuffs here, well maybe only a gist of it.}

Photographs between Drawings

SOOOOOOOOOOOO. Anyways

IM A SENIOR GRADUATING COLLEGE STUDENT ALREADY..~! yei yei!

thats the happy part though.. ; _ ;"
I have to prepare myself for the incoming pressure about my studies and my THESIS. I decided to choose the book illustrations category so... Good luck to me..and
I have been submitting more photographs than drawing and illustrations lately... when I'm supposed to do things the other way around.

well taking pictures and post process it is much more easier than making great drawings right? I sometimes spend almost a week or so just to finish an artwork. but the good thing is, I feel much more fulfillment with myself when I finish an artwork. so yeh.. I'd prefer drawing more..

Overloading Overload Madness

I just finished enrolling last week, the cor processing wasn't so bad compared to the previous semesters so it was good everything was in order (?) I also inquired about the how to overload subjects, regarding about what happened to me, I have to take up psychology again this sem or next sem as much as possible for me to graduate on time. We went and inquired every inst. in the university about the subjects available but the faculty and staff weren't so nice to us. = . = we gave up and found out that overloading subjects will be implemented on the start of class.

I pray to god to give me and the others some slots for that effin subj we need. We are graduating students after all.

blissful shower

hmm.. so many has happened this last few day and one of the reasons im happy because it started to rain now here in the country YEEyyYEY!! It was really hot these past few days and whenever I walk outside its like my whole body was melting and my skin was burning!!   gughghh.. well Im really happy that it started to rain now..

i would rather choose a cold wet weather than a hot one..


the demonic angel out of the professor

regarding that thing about my proffessor.. well I decided to give up on it.. since i have also thought some of things that I did when I was in his class. but he was such a useless professor..  I even didn't learn any single thing from him!! all he did flirt with the guys in our class and jerk us female students.. and oh yeah shhEe errr.. HE!! HEE.. HE! is a one kind of homosexual proffesor that looks like trash with a slight of a mysoginist attitude. and  I losed my temper with him never thinking that HE was still my proffesor who will give my grade. = . ="' now enough of that. Ive learned my lesson. always contol thy temper So to continue the story. my godmother and her brother decided to come with me and talk to him at his office. everything were done fast but the main highlights were my ninang also him started banging on each other and he even flirted with my godmother's brother!! he is such a disgusting human i tell you.

on the job training journey

I had my ojt in this small office in cubao.. its pretty far from home.. I still dont know how to commute there so Im always riding in a taxi.. huhuhu.. my money.. that's why i always come late T _ T sigh.. About the company im working with is divided into two I think, one is the first events asia which handles he say chesse photo booth I think and the other one is bright concepts publishing which handles the wedding planner magazine. Me and my friend were accepted in the company and our boss brought us too a wedding fashion show event in a hotel in Makati to take some photos, but now I am mostly working with the say cheese photos.. designing some layouts for the photobooth some cd covers and tarps, wish they would let me design some other stuffs too.. my office mates and our boss are such nice and funny people.

well I guess thats it for today..